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I MISS YOU >.<

i cant believe what i saw just now!! this feeling is better than finding a million dollors on the floor!!
well, here it goes...

we had just finish visiting one of my mum's friend and was on our way home. as i sat behind my dad's mini pick-up, i saw IKEA ahead of me. however, my dad was on the right lane, waiting to turn right to TPE. i knocked from the back window and pointed to IKEA, which signified that i wanted to go there. so, without any hestitation, my dad left his lane and drove straight.


he parked his car and we were on our way to the foodcourt to eat some delicious meatballs and other delights. as i was walking to the escalator, i saw the small little indoor playground where parents can leave their child in there and shop peacefully. i was just "kpo-ing" and went to see the children. and guess what?




TO MY SURPRISE, I SAW HIM!!! BRANDON KOH!!!


now, at this point of time you might just wonder, who's this koh person that will allow joey to be so happy than having a million dollar.


i got to know brandon in St Anne's Church Kindergarten (Year 1 Attachment) in 2004, when he's in Nursery. i was not very close to him then, but i know he existed because he's another Ah Beng in school, sort of the "Big Bully" type. well, in 2005, i was attached in St Anne's again and this time, i was assigned to be in his class. what made him special was his long pony tail at the back of his head, which was named "The Dragon Tail" by the teachers. as usual, i got very close to him cuz he's an Ah Beng. but other than that, i saw the beautiful side of him that attracted me. he cared for me and really loves me a lot. many hugs and kisses being exchanged. so, in March, i did not go St Anne's because i was having my final year exams. after my exams were over, i couldnt wait to go and look for me. Moreover, it was my birthday and i went back, specially to celebrate. to my disappointment, he left the school. his father withdrew him without a month's notice (some personal reason). i was so deeply hurt and sad. truly, i missed him like crazy. that was the reason why i keep a pony tail at the back of my head - to remember him. that didnt end like this. i was very determined to look for him even though i do not have any of his contacts. i asked soooooooo many people about him and many had no clue about him.

Brandon is in the middle. this is when he was in St Anne. check out his tail.


it took me almost 4 months then that one of the parents was able to tell me where he was studying then. i went down the school to search for him and for the first visit, the teacher told me that he was absent. sianz~ i did not give up. second trip, ya, he didnt come. few days later, i went there again and i found him!! both of us were like hugging in joy, so tightly.

brandon and i when i finally found him!!



be it his birthday, children's day or christmas, i never fail to leave him a card or a present outside his house (cuz i managed to get his address too). there was once when it was his birthday and i happened to be in Thailand. i made my friend to leave a present outside his house. hahaha.. i even called back and asked him if he did leave the present outside. hahha...


okay.. when i saw him, i heart started to pound like it's coming out. i told my parents to go and get a place in the foodcourt first. i was outside the indoor playground, trying to get his attention. 15mins later, i still couldnt get his attention. i even asked a girl in the playground to get number 54 here (cuz IKEA has this system where the child will where a number tag when they play). that girl went to tell the lady working there to get the number 54. hahaha.. i stopped his and told her never mind. so, i started to pray. i have got so much to talk to him about. i wanted to hug him again. i wanted him to see me. it took me so long just to get his attention. (that's the whole thing about children - egocentrism. when playing, they are not conscious about what's happening in the surroundings) we had eye contacts for many times but he had no reaction. till finally, when one of the children made him mad, he walked away from the slide and sat at the edge, facing where i was standing. i waved, i knocked on the glass screen, i was screaming his name inside my head. he looked up, he waved, he smiled. i thank God. he quickly came over and our hands were like against the glass screen. so dramatic but yes, it's like the scene in a jail where he's so near yet he's so far, you can see him but you can touch or hear him. i was dying to hear his voice. well, we looked for ways to say hi to each other. he crawled below, where there's an opening and he said hello... it was pathetic but i was already so happy. it's like the prodigal son, that he was lost but now, he's found and i really felt the feeling. then, i told him to go to the enterance of the playground. i touched his head and just then, his mum stood beside me. oh well, it's time for him to go home. but i was really satisfied and happy to see him. and i really appreciate how God has planned all this for me. i asked him if he remembered my name and he did not cuz he called correctly. hahhaa.. it was hard to say good-bye. i tell you, at that point when he turned and said bye, he smiled with both thumbs up at me, that remained in my head till now.





when i was on my dad's pick-up, i though... i should have wished him "Happy New Year"; i should have told him about my tail i kept; i should have told him "Where's your tail?"; i should have asked him "how's your brother?"; i should have taken a photo with him; i should have given him a hug before we depart. but, these are not important. lest i've got to see him after all these years.




thank you God...


i'll always think of him, especially when people asked me why i have a pony tail, why i keep an ugly tail, why you dont want to cut it. hey people, listen up, the above paragraphs are the reason why i have a pony tail. i wouldnt have time to tell you all so now, take time to read and understand. i am a "chi(1) qing(2)" person and i dont care if it's ugly or curly. it all because of him. hope you will understand after reading all these. i really love him and care a lot for him.


I TELL YOU, I WILL REGRET THE REST OF MY LIFE IF I WERE TO WALK AWAY JUST LIKE THAT, AFTER FAILING TO GET HIS ATTENTION.

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